Not every animal is created equal. Aside from opposable thumbs, some of these vertebrates can barely perform rudimentary calculus. It’s like they’re not even trying and expecting a free ride all the same. Which is where you come in…
What you recognise is that our furry little friends need a rocket up their collective asses. They need less time swinging and more time on advanced number theory. Less bananas, more zeta functions, primes and elliptic curves.
What’s more, by wearing the Animal Testing t-shirt you’ll quickly attract like-minded individuals. People who know that the destruction of natural habitats, laboratory exploitation, and impending extinction should probably come second to solving the Riemann Hypothesis. Probably.